For Musical Monday this week, I am reblogging a post about my Telemann viola concerto solo, which took place approximately one year ago this week. This performance was a big step for me, someone who suffered from extreme performance anxiety throughout my teens and twenties.
I look at kids now, some of my students even, who overcome something like that at much earlier ages, or who were more fearless to start with. Sometimes I grieve for all the time I “wasted.” And yet, in another way I feel that the timing was exactly right. Our culture reveres youth, but it’s hard to be a young adult, even harder to be a teenager. It is much better to spend middle age feeling like the best years are still coming, rather than behind.
It’s a bright, cool California day heralding the coming of summer, and I am free until the evening. I slept well overnight, in spite of reading bad news about someone I knew a lifetime ago. I earned my certificate for completing the 100-day practice challenge last week. Regretful emails trickle in: car trouble, a grandson’s recital, an urgent sample to be analyzed, an unexpectedly long appointment. But my red sparkly Bolero jacket arrived from Jet unexpectedly early. And it fits!
The New World: Yosemite Valley
Once, before a different performance, I dreamed of breaking my bow, borrowing a replacement, and running endlessly over hills and valleys that opened up in between me and the concert venue as the bow morphed into an archery weapon in my hand. But all these current ups and downs . . . I just watch them from a comfortable distance. The new black dress materialized; the…
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